Torn

Next weekend there is a Ruby on Rails Outreach for Women I overlooked it at first, figuring they would want women teachers as well. Last week the organizer corrected me by making the request for help to an all-male room. As much as I feel like I spend all my time doing volunteer work, there are two reasons that this is interesting.

One: I’ve often felt uncommonly blessed to have quite by change stumbled my way into a technology and community going gangbusters. While I don’t know if I can say I’ve received job offers, I’ve had several job inquires. I’m turning away work – of course it may just be the Chicago Ruby vacuum I wonder if I should be giving back – although most of the time I think that I should get a steady income for myself before giving it away.

Two: I sometimes think I might enjoy teaching. Perhaps it’s my problem solving nature – you don’t know something, lets fix it. Perhaps it’s a socially acceptable form of showing off – if you’ve got a question, allow me to distill my experience into something clear, concise, and understandable at your place on the journey.

And yes, there probably is a three; I won’t meet someone if I don’t meet anyone. Invariably somebody will take that the wrong way, and surely if I wasn’t sworn to brutal honesty one might say it was better left unsaid. The problem is: it’s there whether you say it or not, and few people would miss the elephant in the room. The only ‘active’ thing I’ll be doing is slightly tilting the balance in favor of showing up and helping out. From there, we’re all just people.

Complication is, there is a martial arts seminar the same day as the main event. Given the particular circumstances, there is likely to be a great deal of inconvenience if I’m not there. Thus, the great conflict. I’d probably enjoy teaching technology a lot more, but I can also see the harm done if I can’t help out at the seminar.

Of course the short notice aggravates planning. The best I’ve been able to make of it is to show up for the installation Friday night, and perhaps see about next time – the outreach group already has a big enough waiting list for another workshop.

Update: I forgot the fourth reason: because it’s harder.

It is the engine that drives itself
But it chooses the uphill climb

Rush, Cut to the Chase

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